A Journal Page

It hit me the other day,
I have three weeks till leaving for Bible School. So, I started pulling everything out. Got my plastic tubs full of old notebooks, towel sets, gloves, scarves, pens, curtains... a life I had put on hold for a year and a half. It's time to start again. I've gone through my clothes again to pick out what I'm taking and leaving, what keepsakes I'm taking and where they'll go, and all that jazz. It's hard because not only am I thinking about the move to school, but also about where it's all gonna go once my parents leave the country next year for good! I'm kinda packing for a double move.
Gets me on one of those nastalgic runways. I have a hunkering to sit and read through all the journals I've kept. I love to find the closest thing to date in one of my past journals and read what my life was like, what cares I had, and what God was doing one, two, three, four, or five years ago.
It'll be interesting to sit and read about these days in a year or so.

All I Want to Do

Thouroghly enjoyed a good Friday. Worked in the morning till noon and then it was off to an afternoon with friends, coffee, and artsey adventures. I finally got to visit a renoun...(at least among my socials) Coffeshop/Bikeshop. Really enjoyed its brew and company. After a couple more caffinated drinks around town, we decided that a movie was in order. I watched "The Proposal"(since I hadn't seen it before) while the other two did some custom stitchwork on our favorite shoes. My one of my TOMS shoes had a fray after washing them in the washer... so we found some great patch material to.. well.. patch it up. The patches ended up great and I love my TOMS even more now (1) because they are more personally me and (2) because they have evidence of loving friends and good times.

I must say though, my favorite part of the night was sitting on Connally's poarch in the cool of the evening.. discussing, listening, venting, and reflecting over a cup of Chamomile Tea. Now I truely understand why she loves it so much.

If only there could be more days like these.

Wanna Barter?

I know that it's th LOVE of money that is the root of all evil, but at this point I am an addimate believer that it's just the money. Why? Because I HATE it right now, and in my anger I might just go do something rash. No rash ideas come to mind right now, but pretty much money is evil. I should explain.

I'm balancing my checkbook.

Do you understand my aggrivation now? I have four very different amounts that I'm supposed to have in my checking account, but I'm starting to believe that none of them are correct. If it wasn't necessary for me to have a checkbook, I would totally go to having all cash... that way, if I didn't have it on me, I wouldn't buy it. So much simpler.

Tom-lines

Gotta love summer.
Sunshine, clear skies, and sunburns.
The past few days I've been working long hours in the beautiful..though HUMID...sunny days. Also, because of my ingrown toenail, I've been wearing my TOMS, as they are softer and place less pressure on the front of my foot. The result.. instead of my usual dark legs and white socklined feet, I have gained what I call my TOM-lines.

I can't decide what's worse, these or the orininal tanline... either way, it's a good laugh.
What's your worst tanline story?

Beauty in the Rough

"How was your trip?" she asked. I smiled and started to say "It was great!" but something stopped me. Makeing my reply more like, "It was grr...good." There was an obviouse hestation. Why?
The teaching was convicting and powerfull, the fellowship was sweet, God was obviously present... why was it only good?

This Retreat did not go at all as I had planned.
Not only did I feel on guard the whole time, but I also felt like an outcast.

The outcast part couldn't really be helped... I have an ingrown toenail, giving me grief so I did'nt swim or play any sports. However, like everytime I visit up north, I feel the obligation to visit my family and an old friend. I love them like crazy, but I feel like I'm distracted from the reason I came in the first place. When I'm at Retreat, I want to be at Retreat... to meet new people, grow in relationships and take part in the activities. Instead I'm always feeling guilty for "only having a couple hours to hang out" with them.

However...
With my "outcastness" I saw a new perspective of Retreat than had I hung out with my usual crew. The Lord suprised me with a renewed friend.
See, there was a guy interning there who was hanging out with us once in a while as he helped the staff.
We had talked a little in orientation, and I learned that I knew him from two different RC's: '02 and '06. It felt nice to reconnect with someone from that "original" group.
well, as I soaked my foot in salt water on the stairs in the back (my self-proclaimed exile)I noticed that he had been standing against the wall the whole time... so I offered him a stair. He took it, and every Bible session after that, he was there.
Once while I was watching people swim and play games (feeling very much a shadow) he came and sat by me and just started talking. After agreeing to play some tetherball with him, we began to talk about prayer cards. I hadn't ever thought of making some up before until he mentioned it. When I declined, he just off-handedly mentioned,

"I'll just keep praying for you."

intrigued,...

"You pray for me?"
"Ya, you and your family."
...

At this I pushed further to find out that not only had he been praying for me AND one of my best friends from FL, he had been praying for us since that first RC in 2002!!

REALITY CHECK

Who am I to deserve that kind of prayer? What kind of man am I that I don't give that kind of prayer? I always feel like a shadow, someone that isn't remembered after sleep.
REMINDER: Live on purpose, because you never know who you may touch, and who my remember you forever (how will they remember you).

To think I never would have been blessed through it all.
Thank you God for my in-grown toe-nail, because it opened my eyes to reality.
Thank you Jo.. though you quietly serve, you are a greater man of God than I, and I am eternally grateful.

God, bless him.

Women In Art

So many faces, so little time. Check out this video I was just shown!!! I love it!!! It not only plays on my artist heart strings, but also the revelation of beauty.

"Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder."

Do I feel alive?

How is it that I'm already missing you?

Plain Black and White

As many have learned, and I am now learning, people ask a lot of questions when you change. Being as we are, humans ususally like to hover in a homemade norm of their own design, with thier preconceptions and assumptions all figured out. So when someone up and changes, it seems to be a sudden out-of-the-blue occurance. This would bring a part of those preconceptions and assumptions to a crashing reality that anything is possible and things are rarely as they seem.
Getting a tattoo is probly the biggest acts of change I've made, but definatly not the most significant. I was suprised though, when I heard the words, "I never thought you would get one."
I can understand where they might be coming from. After all, I was always the goody-two-shoes teacher's-pet, church boy. I was never really rebelious to any authority. But at the same time, I've always wanted a tattoo. I've always been rather expressive of myself, artsy, and never afraid to write on myself.
It wasn't an act of acting out, it wasn't for spite. My parents have taught us well and though they let us know where they stood, they never forced their convictions on their kids.
My reason for getting this tattoo is simple: To remind me to be content and remind me of lessons I've been taught in years passed. Knowing that God has me where He has me for a reason... therefore, I should look for oppertunities to serve Him, praise Him, and learn from Him.

weheartit

"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid, do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go."

The Overview

What a crazy weekend. It all started Thursday with a speedy trip to a favorite college town to meet up with friends and be scarred for life. Literally, I am now the proud owner of my first tattoo... one I designed myself of course. After sitting hunched over for an hour and a half, we set off to a coffee shop and paid wittness to a cappechino of "Ethic" perportions. But it was a rush as we scurried off to the airport; seeing a three-time-hangout aquaintance off to New Zealand. From there we caught a bite to eat and headed home as a caravan... kindof.
It wasn't long till the three of us were enjoying hot tea and listening to old voicmails down on Connally's family's kitchen floor.
Friday was off work, getting my car preped for my trip up north reminded me of how unadultish I feel, but it ended well with a Guy's night dinner date at Denny's... it's tradition.
Saturday... worked again.
Sunday? yep worked again again... but it was the Fourth, so I enjoyed some fireworks and watching some friends play soccer. Had it not been for my toe problems.. I would have played too, but instead made up the peanut gallery as a party of one.
Today finished my vehicular improvements as well as tidying up the house for house-sitters. The day came to a peek though with the arrival of a long time friend who is a constant encouragment. I'm so glad she's riding up north with me. It'll be so good to catch up and discover the Lord's grace and faithfulness in eachothers' lives.